Time-out

Time is such a precious thing. We all know it. There is never enough of it. We all know the saying, "if I could just go back in time." As for me, well I am no different. I just want more time to do the little things that add up to be really good memories. I think a lot of my problem with not having enough time is making a conscious decision or an effort into prioritizing the things that really matter to me. There are definitely moments that my time could be spent doing much more important things, but I am stuck in this subconscious routine of just doing whatever and at the end of the day I find that I am not satisfied.
I want more. I want more time. The thing is, I have to figure out how to make the best of the time I have. Isn't that what we are all wanting to do? Cherish the moment, seize the day. But as a fast paced society, little time is spent on being mindful and present of the moment. We just go, go, go. Never really absorbing what it is we are doing.
My kids and husband are top priority. We know just how fast time flys when we watch our kids grow. This is something that really puts time into perspective, next to death of course. Kids really make you stop and think about "where the time has gone" or "when in the world did you get so big!" I have major guilt over the lack of time we all have together. Sure, we cuddle, say endless "I love yous," read bedtime stories, say prayers, and praise every little positive moment, but when it comes to the quality and length of time, I need to step up. This is a time I can never get back and I need to make the most of it. It's the everyday routines or habits, if you will, that stop the quality moments from happening. Whether it be cleaning, answering my phone, checking my email, my facebook, there seems to always be something. I seem to have a never ending agenda of things that really come no where near my top priority. My kids absolutely love the moments when we play together. And you know what else? They actually are better behaved when there are more moments like this.
My husband too. He wants more "us" time. More alone time. But, like most every married couple, we take for granted the fact that there is always tomorrow. I have a co-worker who is one of the nicest people I know. Her husband was having pain in his legs and shortness of breath, so he went to the ER to get treated and within a matter of hours was diagnosed with terminal cancer. He's in his 50's. Un-imaginable. One day life is going on as it always does and the next, you are faced with decisions and feelings that nobody should ever have to face. This couple is filled with love and faith throughout it all. It's those life changing stories that put a halt to my normalcy and really makes me evaluate what I need to change. It's the little sparks of love notes, a peck on the lips in passing, holding hands on a walk that turn into beautiful fireworks.
My friends and family are very dear to me. There is certainly not enough time spent with them. Even a couple hours out of my day to call or have coffee with can make such a difference. I wish there was an extra day in a week for friends and family time. They are there when I need a shoulder to cry on or make me laugh until I cry! Yet, finding a time when our schedules aline seems near impossible.
Since these are my real valuables, I need to figure out how I can cherish them more. Delegating things to Dave, such as making phone calls and appointments will help. Taking some of the control out of every little detail that really don't need to be done by only me can make a difference. Keeping a calender up to date with activities, times, and locations will put my mind at ease and decrease my time spent searching for the paper that I wrote the important notes on. Cleaning 15 minutes a day so I don't spend an ENTIRE day and evening scrubbing the house. Dedicating a full hour to the kids of activities we can do together and writing it down the night before so I am held accountable for this time like I would for any other important activity that comes. Making sure that Dave and I schedule date nights at least once per month and dedicate daily quiet time with no tv, kids, phones, or any other distractions that may come up so that we can really be present in the moment and devote the time to each other so he knows that I value his presence and conversation.
It's really up to me to make sure that these moments are treasured. I need to be accountable and make a big effort to change the daily un-engaged "habits" which is essentially my life. As time goes on, these changes will hopefully be my normal and not something that I even think about because it will be the newer and happier me!

Pins and Needles

As I have trialed many different options for the literal pain in my neck, I have found acupuncture to be a worth while therapeutic treatment. My first acupuncture treatment was at a chiropractor's office. I did not realize that there is a difference between acupuncture from someone who studied it for thousands of hours and someone who learned some pressure points at a weekend course. I just knew that the chiropractor was willing to do acupuncture on me prior to my adjustments. This was a time for me to relax. I would lie on a heated blanket with a few needles in my neck and rest. I always fell asleep and it was a time of peace and quiet for me. It was a little un-nerving to hear the chiropractor say that the needles were bending because they didn't want to go into my neck or that there were a couple that didn't want to come out of my neck, but to me anything that touches my neck feels good. I'm pretty indifferent when it comes to treatments to help ease my neck pain and thus am willing to try just about anything.
Upon switching my primary care doctor in desperation for answers and shedding enough tears to fill Lake Superior, he recommended a lady in Edina who does acupuncture. He had high praises for her since she had helped him and his wife with fertility issues. I was quite hesitant at first since Edina is 1 hour away and the chiropractor who does acupuncture is only 15 minutes away. I really thought acupuncture is acupuncture, right? I didn't quite understand the need to drive so many miles if someone close did what I thought was the same thing. I did however need to find a new person to perform my acupuncture because the chiropractor I was seeing had not given adequate documentation to my insurance company regarding my treatment, leaving me without any option, but to seek treatment elsewhere. Funny how someone who tells me that I have one of the worst necks she's ever treated in someone my age has no problem neglecting to provide the proper paperwork required for me to continue my treatment. Anyways, I was looking forward to seeing the doctor in Edina who's specialized in acupuncture and who was a professor who also taught this ancient healing treatment.
The drive to Edina was no doubt a long one. I was pleased to meet a sweet and caring lady who really showed concern regarding my issues. I found out quickly that this was not like the acupuncture I had experienced in the past. She looked at my tongue and checked my pulse, which is something that all people who specialize in acupuncture will do on the initial consultation. This was not done by the chiropractor. She looked at my tongue and gave me a wide eyed concerning look and then said, "Ohhh, ohhh!" I had no idea why the concern over my tongue. Her notes were written in Chinese, but at least she was writing notes! She put in at least 20 needles throughout my neck, 4 times the amount the chiropractor used, and then a couple in my ankles and wrists. She placed a heat lamp on my neck, dimmed the lights, and soothing music played in the background. I quickly shut my mind off. I wasn't driving 60 minutes to not take full advantage of this situation. I fell asleep shortly after she left and an hour later she came to wake me. When I stood up, I felt weightless, as if the tension had been completely removed from my neck, shoulders, and head. To be honest, I wasn't sure if I should drive! This was better than a massage and better than the so-called acupuncture I had in the past. I found that my headaches decreased. The tension and pain came back not too long after my treatment, but at least I now have something that helps to decrease it when it becomes unbearable.
After doing research, I found a lady in Rogers who specializes in acupuncture and am now getting treatment at her office. I wanted to go to someone closer so that I could make the visits more often. Coincidentally, she was taught by the wonderful doctor in Edina! After she looked at my tongue, I asked her what she saw. She said that a tongue like mine, which has so many cracks, is usually seen in someone who is aged or older. She also says it can mean high anxiety, which makes sense.
Acupuncture is amazing! It somehow relaxes my muscles and recharges the signals in my body. I wish I could have acupuncture done everyday. Its truly a great alternative and I highly recommend it!